Stubborn and Independent

Before I get into the meat of this post, let me serve you the rice, and it isn't cooked well.

Saturday morning, 1 day right after I posted the good news, I reversed onto someone's car. This one is completely my fault as I was rushing and didn't look back before I backed out my driveway. There is usually never anyone parked there but this morning there was. I don't think he should have parked there but in the end, it was my fault. This had me in an offset state Saturday and completely ruined my day, and this was in the morning. My insurance came, handled what needed to be handled and everything is back to normal. The damage wasn't too bad but I am sure I won't be paying less for my insurance come July and I am 99% positive it will be going up. I don't need this as I am preparing to pay for school so I was really upset with myself because it was a stupid, careless, avoidable expense. I also now have to buy a left side tail light cover for my car as I broke mine. Le sigh.

Now to serve you the meat.

On Saturday, right before the accident, I mean right before I went outside to get in the car, my mom and I were discussing how I will be financing school. Of course she was offering to help but I was like, no. I have want to do it on my own. It is my responsibility now. There is a lot I can say to both sides of the argument but what it really comes down to is I want to say I was able to do it on my own. Stupid right? I know.

If I had gone straight to university after leaving college with my associate degree, both my parents would have had to support me and probably would still be all now. You probably wouldn't even know me and this blog wouldn't exist cause I am pretty sure my life would have followed a very different path. Finance wise I can guarantee you I would have achieved nothing so far because the old me wasn't financially savvy. Thinking about this makes me wonder if and when I would have come to my financial realization.

Anyways, back to the topic at hand. My mom really wants to help out, it has been her dream for her son to go to university and I am sure it bothered her a little when I decided to go into the workforce, instead of furthering my education. She never pressured me though and I am really thankful for this. One of my reasons for not going directly into university was honestly to ease the burden placed upon my mom and I don't regret my decision one bit. When she found out a bit after Christmas that I had applied for university, she was literally glowing with happiness. I can still remember when she was telling P it was her best Christmas ever.

My mom really wants to help me where she can but she is also willing to let me try at it myself. My dad is also willing to help as I told him I might have to leave my current job and probably pump gas on graveyard shift if necessary. My dad understands, but this is the one of the very few times he has been firm with a decision regarding a choice I make and he does not want me working at a gas station(I think it's because of the danger, P is on the same page from even before the entire university thing).

After I applied in December, I asked my mom if I could stop paying rent in order to save more money in case I get accepted. She agreed willingly so I haven't paid anything at all this year. This is also another reason why I am opposed to receiving her help. She already helps a tonne by putting food on the table and providing shelter, not to mention support when needed and advice.

Jumping back to the morning right before the accident. I needed to take a physical exam by a doctor to submit to the university with my acceptance letter. My mom gave me $70 to assist with this. Her first step in helping me with school, I took it but I told her I would give it back if I didn't need it. Enter the accident and I begin to tell myself, this has to be a sign that I may need help weather I like it or not.

In the end, we came to an agreement, I will try to cover everything myself and if I need any aid, I would ask her and my dad. Any aid I do accept, I plan to keep track of so I will know this is what she helped me with through school and this is what I would like to pay back. I won't count it as a loan though because technically it isn't. I also don't want anything bringing my net worth down. I didn't use the $70 she gave me for the doctor so the PFA(Parental Financial Aid) sits at a lovely $0. My budget is obviously off balanced but I've already put in some overtime for the month so things will work out.

I know it may seem stupid to some not to accept any aid from my parents but at my age, I feel like it should be my responsibility and not my parents. They should be enjoying their money on themselves or saving for retirement, my mom got a late start but she is doing pretty good now. She got a pretty nice tax return that came the same time as my acceptance letter and she was going to give me it to help pay for school, but I told her let me try and cover school myself, so she said she is going to put the money into her RRSP. It made me happy.

Now, don't get me wrong, I don't look down on people who accept their parents help for any of their achievements, nor do I have a problem with it. Everyone is in a different situation. Plus I can't talk much because I still live with my mom in my same bedroom I've had for years so she is obviously helping me out in some way. I just feel like I am old enough that this responsibility should fall on me, my parents sacrificed a lot for me and my siblings and they deserve any break they can get at this point. I'm old enough to have a job so I am old enough to be responsible.

Along with responsibility, it does come back down to me being stubborn and independent and me wanting to prove to myself that I can do it on my own. I want to say at the end of the day that I did it myself without much help(I'm smart enough to know I can't do it alone, maybe financially but I will need support in every other area).

So tell me, what are your thoughts? Are you perfectly fine using the Parental Financial Aid or are you the stubborn and independent DIY type?